2/1-2/5: sweetsweet

Being engaged is interesting because everything significantly family-oriented has a tinge of lastness to it. Last Thanksgiving with just my fam! Last Christmas with just my fam! Last birthday celebrated with just my fam! Last everything as a single lady.

It’s exciting, for sure, to be looking forward to marriage and all (!!), but there’s a sweetness and a bittersweetness to these “last” times of things with just my fam cause I’m sad for the lastness of things. Though, of course, I am infinitely grateful that I’m living in recognition of this now instead of looking back upon these 10ish months and wishing that I woulda thunk it, only in hindsight. Anyhoo. It’s a special and sweet time — a time to be relished.

But this past weekend didn’t have any sort of the bitter that usually comes with its sweet counterpart. This past weekend, I went home for some post-op care of Mama Lee. Took some time off work to go to Cville and lazed around in bed with her, pretending that I was on break from life, too. We slept in until 9:30 and ate lazy breakfasts in bed and watched Korean television and talked to and about Binky. We ate fried chicken just cause we felt like it and had cake to celebrate dad’s birthday too. A boon indeed.

Maybe it was because I actually felt like I had enough time to soak in some family time. Maybe it was because Binky was uncharacteristically sweet and cuddly all weekend. Maybe it was because of the specialness of taking care of a sickish person, doing chores with extra gusto because you know they need your help. This weekend, there was no bittersweet. This weekend was just sweetsweet.